The Islamic Bulletin Volume XXII No. 27 Page 7 The Messenger of Allah (S) said: “The strong man is not the one who can overpower the people by his strength, but the one who controls himself while in anger.” In this blessed month of Ramadan we have the unique opportunity to renew our intentions, correct our behavior, and gain forgiveness of our sins. This is also a time in which the believer must restrain himself from his passions and suspend ful llment of his most basic needs of food, drink, and physical intimacy. Though Allah (SWT) has provided us with these life changing opportunities, it does not, and will not, come without its challenges. There will be times when our hunger, our fatigue, combined with the daily routines of providing and caring for our families may feel overwhelming and our patience is tasked by those around us. Despite the fact that it is the month of Ramadan we are expected to carry on with our daily routines, pursuing our provisions, caring for our children, cooking, cleaning, and all the other tasks, we must do all year round. There may come times when we may feel the urge to lash out in anger. These may be areas in which we have developed unhealthy coping skills to deal with our frustrations, areas which we need to be working on in order to draw closer to Allah. These times o er further opportunities for us to not only gain the Baraka of Allah through restraint, but to also train ourselves in good adab (manners) within the prophetic model of human behavior. The Prophet (S) described cures for this “disease” and ways to limit its e ects, among which are the following: Seeking refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan: The Prophet (S) said: “If a man gets angry and says, ‘I seek refuge with Allah,’ his anger will go away.” Sulayman ibn Sard said: “I was sitting with the Prophet (S), and two men were slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet (S) said, “I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said ‘I seek refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan,’ what he feels (i.e. his anger) would go away.” (Bukhaari) Keep Silent: The Messenger of Allah (S) said: “If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent.” This is because in most cases, the angry person loses self-control and could utter words of kufr/disbelief, or curses, or the word of divorce (talaaq) which would destroy his home, or words of slander which would bring him the enmity and hatred of others. So, in short, keeping silent is the solution to help one avoid these mistakes. Do Not React: The Messenger of Allah (S) said, “If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down.” Among the bene ts of this advice given by the Prophet (S) is the fact that it prevents the angry person from going out of control, because he could strike out and injure someone. Sitting down makes it less likely that he will become overexcited, and lying down makes it even less likely that he will do something harmful. Anger is one of the evil whispers of Shaytaan, which leads to so many evils and tragedies, of which only Allah knows of the full extent. For these reasons, it is important that we learn how to control our anger. The di erent ways that each of us takes to ght anger is a bene cial quality to possess. ANGER So the next time an impatient driver cuts you o or honks, remember the words of our Holy Prophet (S) and remain calm. For then we will have possessed a greater strength than the one who loses his/her cool. For the real test of strength is the one who controls himself in anger. Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.” Mark Twain ”For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.” Ralph Waldo Emerson “Do not teach your children never to be angry; teach them how to be angry.” Lyman Abbott “Anger and negativity are like cancer. They eat away at you and drain you of your life force.” Jennifer J. Passmore “Every time you get angry, you poison your own system.” A. Montapert “Anger is a killing thing: it kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had been before—it takes something from him.” L’Amour “Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame.” Benjamin Franklin “Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful to us than the injury that provokes it.” Lucius Annaeus Seneca “Fair peace becomes men; ferocious anger belongs to beasts.” Ovid “He who angers you conquers you.” Elizabeth Kenny “If a small thing has the power to make you angry, does that not indicate something about your size?” Sydney J. Harris “There is nothing that so much grati es an ill tongue as when it nds an angry heart.” Thomas Fuller “There is nothing more galling to angry people than the coolness of those on whom they wish to vent their spleen.” Alexandre Dumas “Anger: One Letter Short Of Danger!.” Author Unknown “Anger and intolerance are the enemies of correct understanding.” Gandhi “Anger is a wind which blows out the lamp of the mind.” Robert Ingersoll “No man can think clearly when his sts are clenched.” George Nathan ”If you kick a stone in anger, you’ll hurt your own foot.” Korean Proverb “People who ght re with re usually end up with ashes.” Pakistani Proverb “I don’t have to attend every arguement I’m invited to.” Author Unknown
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